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AUGUST 12 VHS MOVIE REVIEW : POOR PRETTY EDDIE
From cinemade.startlogic.com
So out of the blue come two recommendations for obscure blaxploitation films, right next to each other. The person who wrote me about this film wouldn’t tell me what it’s about, but merely listed this film’s alternate titles: Black Vengeance, Heartbreak Motel and Redneck County Rape. I’m sure you couldn’t think any worse of me if I told you that this made me WANT to see it.
So we open with Leslie Uggams as Liz Weatherly, singer so famous she is asked to sing the Star-Spangled Banner at some huge stadium at a baseball game. We hear her entirely uninspired version, which may in fact prove to be some kind of ironic statement, then cut to the front grill of her massive while Rolls Royce. We hear that she has two weeks before her next set of concerts, and that she’s going to drive "until she finds a nice hole to crawl into." Why she chooses to drive through the backwoods bayous is left 100% unexplained.
Now I will state up front that I believe this movie has artistic pretensions—if not quite artistic realization—and this is first apparent during the credits, where we have repeated shots of a huge backwoods [and I mean BACK WOODS] water wheel, and hear only the sounds of the woods and the creaking of the wheel. We don’t see Liz’s car breakdown, we just, once the credits are over, see her inexplicably wandering in the woods. She finds herself at some rural watering hole, with huge goon Keno, who introduces her to Eddie, muscular redneck in a white tank top. Eddie leers at Liz and says everything in an sexually insinuating tone of voice. It doesn’t take him long to realize that Liz is a star that he’s seen on TV, and what do you know, turns out Eddie has singing aspirations of his own. He says they’ll fix her car right up, and you know, maybe she’ll have time to hear some of his singing. Liz responds with icy condescension.
We now meet Shelley Winters as Bertha, chain-smoking drunk monster mom dressed as a floozy. She finds that false eyelash she’s been looking for among her rumpled bedsheet and puts it on. You know, you have to just love Shelley Winters for taking these roles. I love you, Shelley! Turns out she is not Eddie’s mom, but his LOVER, despite the fact that she’s in her fifties and he’s in his twenties, and she demands that he get rid of this other woman immediately. He shuts her up by kissing her all over, which drives her into a state of enflamed desire.
Meanwhile it seems that Liz dabbles in photography, and has decided to document the rural backwoods. I’m sure you are familiar with the movie convention where we see her taking pictures, then have little still images to show us the pictures she’s taking, but what’s amusing here is that Liz seems to be such a strikingly AWFUL photographer! She takes completely undistinguished pictures of just LEAVES and stuff. Anyway, although nothing is happening, suddenly the music goes CRAZY, and it’s almost a minute before we see a reason: there’s someone watching her! Like, OMG.
That night Liz is still dripping icy disdain as Eddie shows up for dinner in an spangled country outfit with fringe that looks like something Elvis might have rejected as too understated. Then Slim Pickens shows up as Orville, the town sheriff, who has a semi-retarded son.
So they have this tense family dinner—I wish I knew what they were eating. Bertha is trying to be nice to Liz, but is clearly ready to viciously turn on her at any moment. Eddie is gearing up to ask to perform—and she’d better say yes. Orville is an outrageous stereotype of the squealing redneck moron. And through it all, Liz is being a total bitch. Okay, maybe, from a racial/political perspective, she shouldn’t HAVE to be friendly, but on the other hand, she’s a defenseless black woman among racist rednecks and with no way to escape—so I don’t think it’s out of the question for her to have a little CONTEXTUAL INTELLIGENCE and at least attempt to be civil. She really goes out of her way to offend when Eddie is going to perform his music for her—and at that moment she asks if she can make a telephone call. But surprise, the telephone is out.
So Eddie gets up to perform. First he gives the song a long, LONG intro, speaking as though he is before a large audience of his most devoted fans. The he sings his horrible song, which is an ode from a husband to his wife. Liz is about as receptive to it as you can imagine. Especially after she has learned that her car has not been fixed and she will have to stay the night. After she’s excused herself, Orville tells Eddie how Liz “couldn’t take her eyes off him” while he was on stage. Bertha then makes a desperate attempt to get Eddie into her bed, saying she’s gonna unload a jam-packed canister of sweet lovin’ all over him so good that he’ll never want to leave. He leaves.
SPOILERS > > >
When Liz gets out of the shower, she comes out to discover Eddie shirtless and with a glass of wine in her bed. She tells him get out, but he hears “Do me!” It gets to the point where she knees him in the crotch, and then he drags her to the bed and rapes her. Okay, here’s how it goes: He leaves his jeans on and basically wrestles with her in slow-motion. This is intercut with Orville and others watching dogs fuck. It seems clear to me that the footage of the dogs fucking is there to up the sexual content and IMPLY the rape without explicitly having to SHOW the rape—and it works really well. I was a little disappointed in my fellow mankind to read in all the other IMDb external reviews [i.e. these are people writing reviews for websites, not just IMDb users] that they consider the dog footage just a completely senseless, random insertion and react with an attitude of “Well now I’ve seen everything!”
So the next day Liz tells Bertha that she was raped, and Bertha tells her: You better stay away from MY MAN! Bertha tells her to get the fuck out and if she means to say anything that might harm her poor, sweet Eddie, Bertha will testify that Liz attacked Eddie. In here Bertha gives a heartfelt speech [to Liz, not the most receptive audience] about how she just loves her Eddie and just can’t help it. Now, after about 45 minutes, we begin a SUDDEN voice-over by Liz as she coaches herself to be strong. Then Eddie takes Liz to this local dam for her to take some publicity shots. He acts as though his rape of her was no big deal. Then this other, gross blond redneck friend of the family offers to give Liz a ride to where she can get some help—and forces her to fellatiate him, telling her how she’s going to experience ecstasy. Hmm, I don’t think he’s going to be much help. Which proves to be exactly the case when Eddie emerges from the backseat and beats the blond guy down. He then whips Liz, with his handy-dandy whip he apparently brought along for just such a situation, and tells her “You’re gonna be my girl!”
After this, Liz steals a jeep and makes a break for it, but ends up getting pulled over by Orville. She sits at a table and tells him that she was raped. “Real rape?” he asks? Yes, she says, and as she’s talking he pushes a bowl toward her and asks her is she’d like to “suck on a tomato.” He then starts probing her for details, all the while taking notes on his pad. He asks “Did he put any suck marks on you?” and just generally doesn’t seem to be taking the inquiry seriously. Which is revealed a second later, when we see that the “notes” he’s taking are just dirty doodles. He takes her to the town honky-tonk, where a large group of the locals are gathered. He tells them that Liz reported a rape, and they decide that they can have the trial right there. They force Liz up on a pedestal, and tell her to produce any evidence she has, such as “suck marks.” When she doesn’t produce any, they rip open her shirt. She screams in slow-motion for quite some time and the editing once more goes all artsy.
Then Eddie makes a stew for everyone, including Bertha, Liz and Keno, and makes sure they’ve all had some meat when it is revealed that the meat was Keno’s dog. The movie once more goes insane and Liz issues more prolonged screams. She is staring at herself in the mirror in her room when she looks up and sees a white woman [or Eddie?] in her place.
Then Eddie asks Bertha to get out her old wedding dress, and she gets all atwitter, excited that her dream is finally coming true, and says that she’s not sure she’ll be able to fit in it. “You think I’m going to marry a dumb broad like you?” Eddie says. He then tells Liz of his plans and says “Once we’re married you’ll be decent again.”
So Liz wears the dress and Eddie brings her into the town hall, where this woman with a crazy beehive is singing. By now, Liz is completely blank and catatonic. Now, I forgot to mention that after the dog incident, Eddie shot Keno, and left him for dead. Now the bizarre wedding is going on and the editing is once more going crazy artsy [or just crazy], and then Keno comes in with a shotgun and blows Eddie away. There is more extended, slo-mo screaming, to the point where you’re wondering if David Lynch stepped in and re-edited this. Liz gets ahold of the rifle and shoots Eddie, although he has already been shot twice and is clearly already far down the road to death, so it doesn’t come off as much of a revenge. She then sees herself with the shotgun in the mirror, and—the end!
< < < SPOILERS END
It’s hard to say what’s really going on here. It’s clearly straining for some kind of artsiness with its showy editing and stylistic contrivances, but it’s hard to discern what it’s supposedly saying. Basically, we just watch Liz be treated worse, and worse, and worse, and still worse. Her “revenge” at the end is severely neutered—she basically wasn’t responsible for Eddie’s death at all—which makes it difficult to place this movie in the Blaxploitation category. It really just comes off as pure exploitation—watch a woman be sexually humiliated. Repeatedly. I had read somewhere that this was a retelling of Jean Genet’s The Blacks, and did a fair amount of digging to see if that was true, but ultimately I think no, it’s not—although again, the seeming artsiness with which it’s presented makes one think there must be SOMETHING going on here. But I have to say, ultimately I can’t see what, and what you end up with is just pure exploitation. There are two credited directors, and apparently one came in and reworked the others' material, so maybe that's the answer.
So there you go. Yes, it’s unusual, but it doesn’t amount to much and doesn’t leave you with much—except questions about why anyone would make it. And why actors like Shelley Winters and Slim Pickens would be in it. And especially Leslie Uggams—WHY in God’s name would she agree to make this movie? There’s nothing uplifting or enriching about it, and her part is flat and horrible. These are the lingering questions you’ll be asking yourself, but ultimately maybe the best thing is just not to watch it in the first place.
SHOULD YOU WATCH IT?
I’m not sorry I saw it, as it really is quite… SOMETHING… but I wouldn’t really recommend anyone else sit through it.
AUGUST 12 VHS MOVIE REVIEW : A TASTE OF BLOOD
From monstersatplay.com
This is probably going to be one of the shortest reviews you'll find here on Monsters at Play. Not because I didn't enjoy the DVD I was sent by Kettle Cadaver, but simply because this DVD only ran 20-minutes and it's nothing more than a barrage of shocking imagery, some of which could even give the otherworldly fellas of Hellraiser a run for their money. The main difference here being, that this footage appears to be all too disturbingly real.
In case you aren't in the know, Kettle Cadaver is a band. I hadn't heard of them until I had received this DVD and I was guaranteed some outright disturbing and rude behavior prior to its arrival. These claims turned out to be 100% truthful, this is some sick as hell shit right here. A Taste of Blood is a 20-minute collection of clips showing off the band Kettle Cadaver in action. Of course by "in action" I mean scenes of self-mutilation (including that of the penis) by the truckload. Amidst the concert clips, behind the scenes band moments and artsy music video segment, there's plenty of real life bleeding taking place here, someone better call a nurse, and quick!
Let's get a little more specific here. Self-mutilation by puncturing the skin with needles, attaching chains and stretching out the flesh, nails thru scrotum sacks, blood drinking (and subsequent spitting), random fighting and ass kicking, the band performing underwater and an ever so brief glimpse of some backstage sexual shenanigans (c'mon guys, why so brief - little help here?).
All of the engrossing visuals are accompanied by some original Kettle Cadaver music, which I found to be somewhat interesting. Of course there's a lot of yelling, instrument smashing and telling the world to basically go fuck itself (a point I somewhat agree with). The whole thing reeked of GG Allin - I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't wholly fascinated and thoroughly entertained. My only real complaint here is that it was just too damn short, I wanted more, much more - such is life.
Picture quality varies throughout depending on the video source. Visuals are mostly clean, you'll be able to make out some details you'll wish you hadn't. The Mono audio track is equally as clean and clear.
I think I'd like to attend a Kettle Cadaver show, that is if it weren't for the fact that I fear I'd have my ass kicked 10-times over, I'm sure there's no room in that crowd for this here horror nerd. Props to Kettle Cadaver for keeping Rock 'n Roll alive and kicking and for being just plain rude (in the best possible way that one can possibly be rude that is).
A Taste of Blood DVD is available for $10.00 in the USA and $15.00 in the rest of the world (Postage is included in price). Send well concealed US cash (at your own risk) or a money order made out to: Sean Duvall at: H.R.R. PO Box 891732 Temecula CA 92589-1732 USA and be sure to tell 'em that The Monsters sent ya!
AUGUST 12 VHS MOVIE REVIEW : DIE SCREAMING MARIANNE
From horrorview.com
On paper at least, it sounded like a great idea: a modern-day suspense thriller, steeped in the stylish twists and turns of a ’40s film noir plot and replete with classic Hitchcockian flourishes of suspense - all dressed up with jaded post-sixties cynicism and the flowery Carnaby street fashions of the early '70s. This was Pete Walker's idea of "Die Screaming Marianne"; the result of a chance meeting between Walker and TV floor manager-cum-screen writer Murray Smith, it was the pair's second project together, coming hot on the heels of their successful sexploitation flick, "Cool it Carol", and it provided a great chance for Walker to branch out as a film-maker with his own stab at a Cluzot-inspired thriller, similar to the kind of thing Jimmy Sangster often dashed off for Hammer films around this time.
An enjoyable first half, which seems to bear out Walker's hopes of updating the romantic noir plotting of Charles Vidor's "Gilda" - with voluptuously fresh newcomer Susan George taking up the Rita Hayworth mantle - is soon sadly squandered in the second half, when recourse to some tricksy cross-cutting editing techniques still can't disguise the fact that the film's messy production history - its tight budget and over-running schedule - had forced the director to throw out a good sized chunk of the screenplay in the middle of the shoot, just to get the thing finished. The young, hip cast bring a different edge to familiar material but their on-set hi-jinx famously led to the production almost being abandoned mid-shoot, with Walker feeling forced to issue a statement to the press to that effect, simply in order to regain some degree of control and authority over the film. The result is by no means a disaster, with many nice performances and several pleasing set-pieces; but the film losses momentum and slides into near incoherence in the second half, and there is far too much of a languor in the middle act before the downbeat ending leaves one with more questions than answers.
Marianne MacDonald (Susan George) is an exotic dancer known as 'The Hips'. While leading a free-and-easy fun-loving lifestyle, go-go dancing her way around Europe, she hitches up with mop-topped man-about-town Sebastian Smith (Christopher Sandford) after nearly being run down by his Austin Healey in the Portuguese Algarve. They fly back to England and have a two week fling in Brighton after which Sebastian asks her to marry him. Not being entirely convinced of the seriousness of his offer, but not that bothered either, she goes along with the idea - but ends up hitched to Sebastian's best friend and best man, Eli Frome (Barry Evans), instead.
It turns out that Sebastian is working for Marianne's demented, perverted and hopelessly corrupt father: an ex judge (Leo Genn) who wants to get a hold of her and bring her back home, because she has previously obtained the number of a deposit account, given to her by her mother before she died mysteriously - as well as access to incriminating papers which reveal his corrupt activities on behalf of the mob. The Judge is apparently also engaged in an incestuous relationship with his psychotically deranged daughter, Hildegarde (Judy Huxtable): a panda-eyed beat girl stick insect who wants her half-sister Marianne dead simply out of sheer spitefulness, and lives with her father in his plush, modernist cliff-top home in a remote part of Portuguese.
Eli innocently offers Marianne refuge in his Brighton flat, unaware of the complications of her past, and soon finds himself under threat. Narrowly avoiding an attempt on his life by two heavies pretending to be policemen, who corner him in the upper storey of a down-at-heel apartment block, Eli accompanies Marianne and Sebastian (who confesses his original involvement with the Judge), on a trip back to Portugal, where they hope to confront the Judge in his own home. A labyrinthine network of twisted relationships is soon revealed that leads to even more plotting, murder and duplicity.
Shot on the cheap in Brighton but with some Portuguese location filming intended to add some glamour to proceedings, Walker comes very close to successfully bringing off an early idiosyncratic gem of a thriller, with a more mainstream appeal than his previous exploitation-based material possessed. The opening title sequence alone is a classic piece of late-sixties bubblegum razzmatazz, with a gyrating, bikini-clad Susan George shimmying against a lush crimson backdrop as Cyril Ornadel’s Hammond and brass-driven Bond-style theme music pounds out on the soundtrack. An authentic ’70s period feel, familiar to most of Walker’s work, brings a different flavour to the film’s nicely handled Hitchcock-inspired set-pieces, and the cast of up-and-coming bright young things certainly have visual appeal, even if Barry Evans seems slightly miscast - with his leather trousers and mod stripy shirts giving him an unusually fey appearance for a romantic lead. Christopher Sandford makes an interesting antagonist - part trend-setting weasel, part likable chancer; while a twenty-year-old Susan George is delectable as the pouty, tom boyish title character. But still, Walker’s uncertain direction and choppy editing might well have let the film down completely if not for the combined performances of Hollywood veteran Leo Genn and sixties ‘It Girl’ Judy Huxtable, who are genuinely unnerving as the incestuous father and daughter team at the centre of the convoluted story’s somewhat contrived web of intrigue. Murray Smith’s script really comes to life when cooking up over-heated dialogue for this pair which beautifully plays up the lustful melodrama of their perverted relationship. Walker just wasn't able to control the disparate elements of the plot at this early stage in his directing career, though, and the final act fails to hold on to the required level of suspense, coming across as a bit of a deflated muddle.
Odeon Entertainment re-release this minor cult thriller in a slightly faded print (it looks like the same one from the previous Anchor Bay version) and with a Jonathan Rigby moderated commentary track which proves to be an entertaining listen; there’s also a brand new video interview in which Walker now seems much happier with the results of his endeavours than he did when the commentary was originally recorded, admitting that the film isn't one of his best efforts but that it has some nice moments nonetheless. This seems a fair assessment. It’s not up there with his trio of classics, but it continues to illustrate the obsessive themes at the heart of all Walker’s cinema - that of the corrupt older generation feeding off of the carefree young, and the moral degeneracy for which the family structure often provides a respectable veneer, and in that respect it is worth seeking out by newer fans of this intriguing cult director.
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