OUR GOAL AT VHS WASTELAND IS TO PROVIDE YOU WITH THE STRANGEST AND MOST HARD TO FIND VHS COVERS IN HISTORY. BUT WE CAN'T DO IT ALONE. BELOW IS A LIST OF THE GENEROUS MEN AND WOMEN WHO CONTRIBUTE VHS SCANS TO THE SITE. IF YOU ARE INTERESTED IN BEING PART OF OUR TEAM, YOU CAN FIND INSTRUCTIONS AND TEMPLATE FILES HERE AND YOU CAN CONTACT JAMES GILKS BY CLICKING HERE. WE HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON.
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Hello and welcome to VHS Wasteland! VHS WASTELAND is your home for high resolution scans of rare, strange, and forgotten vhs covers. Each of these bizarre gems is scanned at 200 dpi. Our staff of over 40 contributors (and more added all the time) scans and posts between 15-30 new covers every day along with reviews, trailers and much more! So bookmark our homepage and check the site often! Simply click on the thumbnail of any vhs cover to download the full high res format. We'd also love submissions from you. If you have a vhs that is weird or rare, you can find info on what we are looking for here.
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APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
THE ALCHEMIST - SUBMITTED BY RYAN GELATIN
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
LITTLE MARINES : AN ADVENTURE - SUBMITTED BY ZACH CARTER
LITTLE MARINES : AN ADVENTURE - REVIEWED BY ZACH CARTER
I forced my Mother to rent Little Marines an obscene number of times from Video Depot, our video store of choice when I was a kid. I loved it. Watching it now though I have no idea what about the movie appealed to me when I was a kid. It's low budget keeps it from ever becoming the sort of action spectacle that the filmmakers probably wanted it to be. You could never mistake it for something like The Goonies, another of my childhood favorites. The most exciting action set piece is a chase scene between bikes (some BMX and one dirt bike that's only going as fast as a BMX to maintain the illusion that there is a believable chase going on) all set on an unattractive mound of dirt in the woods. And the characters talk way too much about their feelings to keep the average kid entertained. What I was drawn to as a child in this movie is beyond my adult comprehension, but the cynical grown up in me loved every second of this bizarre, southern-fried piece of cinematic gold.
The movie opens by introducing us to Stevie, the token fat kid, as his teacher spanks him in front of the schoolhouse. And when I say spank I mean paddle with a large oar. After his corporal punishment she tells Stevie to "have a good Summer." I'm assuming the filmmaker's intended there to be a lesson in there somewhere; the teacher isn't a bad person, she just knows that sometimes the only way to get your point across to a child is to hit them in front of their peers, or something like that. You'll learn valuable life-lessons like that throughout Little Marines. We're quickly introduced to the other two annoying pubescent boys who make up the bulk of the cast; Noah, the sensitive one, and Chris, the tough guy who hangs out with geeks to make himself seem cooler. They also have a friend named David, but it's best to ignore him because his Mom is a bitch and she won't let him go on the coolest camping trip ever. The boys (the Little Marines if you will) have had it planned for months, an awesome weekend camping trip to kick of their Summer vacation in style.
Pretty quickly after the opening credits it becomes apparent that the main reason this movie exists is to instill good morals into unsuspecting children. The Little Marines themselves have impeccable morals. When a totally ridiculous drug dealer offers the boys free joints from the window of his red Corvette they rebuff him without even considering their options. "No way man, we don't need drugs to have a good time." When Stevie crashes another kid's model airplane, instead of riding away on his bike or making Chris help him beat the kid up, Stevie actually pays for the damages. After setting up their teepee, the Little Marines even erect a flag pole and stand at salute while the national anthem plays on their tape deck; the patriotism is actually enough to bring a tear to Stevie's eye. It's easy to see why this movie won the American Family Alliance Award of Excellence in 1991. The Little Marines bicker like any good friends, but when push comes to shove they're always there for each other. Like when local bully and dirt bike aficionado Snake corners Stevie and pelts him with paintballs (causing him to curl into the fetal position and cry), Noah and Chris are there to lure Snake away and save Stevie any further embarrassment. Or when Noah has a hard time dealing with the recent death of another of their close friends, Chris and Stevie take the time to listen to him and help him remember the good times that they shared. Lucky for us though, all the sentimentality that the American Family Alliance found so sincere and heartwarming, we can now mock openly.
Even with all of the aforementioned excellence, my favorite scene in the movie is the one where the boys happen upon a mysterious, machete-wielding man in the woods near their campsite. They approach him with extreme caution but that doesn't stop Stevie from being caught in one of the man's many booby traps. Chris and Noah watch in horror as the man approaches Stevie with his machete, thinking that Stevie may spend the last moments of his life hanging upside down from a tree. Little Marines could have taken an amazing turn at that point and become the best children's movie of all time. But unfortunately it didn't, that man's just a friendly camper who tells the boys a sob story about a drunk driver killing his wife and child. Noah opens up to the man and tells him that his Father was killed in Vietnam before he was even born; I did a little math and can't really wrap my head around how that's actually possible. A more likely scenario is that Noah's Mother has lied to him all these years and doesn't actually know who his real Father is.
In the big finale (which is totally anticlimactic) Stevie and Noah finally get their moment to shine when they save Chris from drowning after a diving accident. They drag him to the shore and revive him with the sorriest excuse for CPR that I've ever witnessed (which is to say they laid Chris face down in shallow water and then a fat kid sat on his back). Then the movie ends abruptly with a freeze frame of a triumphant Stevie raising his fist into the air, which only made me wish that I was watching The Breakfast Club instead. Little Marines is probably only amazing if you have fond memories of it from childhood, but I can't do anything but recommend it.
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
SORORITY BABES IN THE SLIMEBALL BOWL-O-RAMA
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
DEADLY VOYAGE - SUBMITTED BY GEMIE FORD
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
THE SUPERNATURALS
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
DEATH MAGIC
MARCH 30 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
STEPHEN KINGS NIGHTSHIFT COLLECTION : VOLUME ONE - SUBMITTED BY ZACH CARTER
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
357 MAGNUM
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
IMAGINE THAT! GREAT MOMENTS AND PEOPLE IN HISTORY VOLUME 1
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
COSI FAN TUTTE
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
TIMEWARP
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
TERROR TAPE: FUCK #8 VIDEO MAGAZINE
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
FROM BEYOND : MONSTERS AND SCI-FI MONSTERS
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
CHIP N DALE RESCUE RANGERS : DOUBLE TROUBLE
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
GROTESQUE
APRIL 5 2011 VHS COVER SCAN - CLICK FOR HIGH RES VERSION
MURDER IN PARIS
APRIL 5 VHS MOVIE REVIEW : NIGHT OF HORROR (1978)
Watching this film is like having a very painful bowel movement, you know, the kind where you're in a public place and the pain starts to build up and you have to press your ass cheeks together with all your muscle power as you jump into your car and try to make it home before you explode and then you make it home and sit on the toilet screaming in pain as the excrement pours out in a burst of agonizing thrust that nearly sends you up to the ceiling. That about describes what it's like to view this film which concerns four "adults" whose camper gets stuck in what turns out to be a Civil War battlefield and encounter ghosts of soldiers that died there. There's no words to describe how bad this film is. The photography is so bad that at one point there's a big black blotch at the bottom center of the screen for at least ten minutes. The acting (by Steve Sandkuhler, Gae Schmitt, Rebecca Bach and Jeff Canfield) is so poor that you can hear dead actors moaning in their graves. The piano music just drones on and on and the direction by Tony Malanowski consists of static shots of talking heads and Civil War re-enactment footage. Malanowski would later make the similarly-themed CURSE OF THE CANNIBAL CONFEDERATES in 1982 which also starred Sandkuhler and Bach and work in various capacities on Don Dohler's NIGHTBEAST the same year before becoming an editor on such films as FELONY (1994) and MUTANT SPECIES (1995). Thank God for small favors. If you must watch this film, do it with a roll of toilet paper handy. You'll thank me later. Malanowski wishes Don Dohler good luck in the credits. He must be the Prophet of Doom! A Genesis Home Video Release in SP mode and later released by Star Classics in EP mode. If this film ever gets a DVD release, I'll eat my own excrement! Rated R, but there's nothing here to warrant the rating. { text from critcononline.com }
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