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VHS MOVIE REVIEW : NIGHT OF THE DEMON
FROM KINDERTRAUMA.COM

I wish someone could explain to me why the Bigfoot movie NIGHT OF THE DEMON is not the most celebrated horror movie in the world. I don’t get it. I realize that it was banned in the U.K. as a video nasty, and that it’s never really been distributed properly uncut in the U.S., but I’m kind of shocked that it’s not more notorious.

Should the blame be placed on the generic, misleading title or the fact that, on a technical level, the film is so relentlessly amateurish that it gives one the impression that it may have been assembled by Bigfoot himself? I still don’t get it. I mean the big guy actually rips off some poor dude’s weenie in this movie and I feel that alone should seal the film’s reputation for eternity.

In most movies about the (some say) mythical beast, he is shown as a GARBO-esque, chronically shy recluse. In NIGHT OF THE DEMON, Bigfoot rapes a lady on her front lawn as her religious zealot father watches from the porch. To me, that’s like the exact opposite of shy (or the recorded behavior of GARBO). Come to think of it, I can’t believe I used to feel sorry for ol’ tall dark and hairy, especially after the way he grabs a sad sack in his sleeping bag in this movie, spins him over his head in a circle a couple times and then throws him into a sharp branch, impaling him like a campfire marshmallow on a twig. Let’s not even mention the whole bashing two knife holding Girl Scouts together so that they stab each other routine. C’mon Sasquatch, that’s just sick…

It’s true that the script is borderline Neanderthal and that the acting is all around lame, but I have to confess that when a film looks this much like late seventies porn, I can let stuff like that slide. I’m not saying that there are not scenes here that will bore normal humans to near tears, but seriously IT HAS THE GREATEST ENDING EVER FILMED!!! If the special effects were just a little bit better, it would blow that whole raft scene from THE BURNING right out of the water. Just when you think you’ve seen it all and are ready to call it a day, ol’ Biggy crashes a cabin and literally beats the living daylights out of the entire cast. I’m not kidding; he throttles the stuffing out of them. He rips out one guy’s intestines and actually starts beating his friends with it. A lady gets a pitch fork shoved up her backside, another guy gets his face pushed into a burning stove, and it’s all done in hilarious slow motion while Bigfoot roars his furry head off. I’ve never seen anything like it. It’s like an ITCHY & SCRATCHY cartoon come to life, and I can’t wait to watch it again.

As much as the professionalism of DEMON leaves something to be desired, I have to give credit where credit is due. Even beyond its obvious value as a gore flick, I respect the obvious effort to create something a bit different. The entire tale is basically a flashback story that not only has flashback stories within the flashback story, but also dreams within the flashbacks within the stories or something like that. If that weren’t enough, we’re also privy to “Bigfoot Vision,” that’s when you see the woods through a blood red circle. Even if you were to remove the delicious violence, I must thank the makers of this movie for introducing me to the character of “Crazy Wanda” who chomps on candy, looks like the lead singer of THE DIVINYLS and gives birth to the monster’s baby. She alone would have made this picture worthwhile. (I should point out that even though Bigfoot raped crazy Wanda, when he’s not killing people he brings her presents nearly everyday).

You may read bad reviews of this movie elsewhere, but pay them no mind; those people are lying to you. I don’t know why or to what end, but they are lying through their teeth! NIGHT OF THE DEMON is amazing…

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VHS MOVIE REVIEW : ALIEN TERROR
FROM ANGELFIRE.COM/DARKSIDE/REALMOFHORROR

AKA: Alien Sulla Terra, Alien on Earth, Alien 2, Alien - Die Saat des Grauens Kehrt Zuruck

Not to be confused with the Boris Karloff film of the same name, or the similarly themed "Contamination" this is another one of those cheapo Italian knock-off's that came out in the wake of "Alien".

The plot of this film however moves the action from outer space to deep underground, focussing on a group of pot-holers who get more then they bargained for when they encounter extra-terrestrial life deep under the Colorado mountains.

In this, Thelma (Belinda Mayne) and her crew of cave explorers are preparing to check out a series of subterranean caves, when news reports start coming in that the crew of a spacecraft, meant to be landing nearby, have simply disappeared. Thinking nothing of it, they climb down into the vast labyrinth of caves and tunnels inside the mountain and begin to explore.

One of them brings along some strange rocks he claims were strewn around the entrance. But soon after descending to the depths of the cave, they discover the rock is no ordinary geological sample as the plucky pot-holers find themselves being stalked by strange looking, tentacled alien creatures which emerge from the rock faces.

Trying to escape from the labyrinth of caves, they find themselves getting picked off one by one by the aliens, which can take over your body and cause your head to explode, as the rest of the team soon find out. But even if they do survive, what awaits them above?

Not bad as far as these cheapo Italian films go, but that's about it. There's a couple of good gore effects, but the action is way too slow. It takes some 40 odd minutes to get to the action, and the scene where the first head explosion takes place took so long you could have grown a beard whilst waiting. The film isn't a total loss. But unless you're a fan of Italian films you might not like this.

Makes an excellent companion piece with the film "Contamination".

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